Chapter Thirty Eight
" No " I whispered softly shaking my head, I didn't want to do all he was saying.
He stood still, his chocolate orbs on me and slowly his lips stretched in to a beautiful smile one but it didn't calm me in the least.

"This is not funny " I added but still I didn't receive a single reply from him, my Gale. I wanted to scream loudly and let him know that I belong here right next to him.
And am dying of cancer right so all his words sounded like no sense to me, I will soon be dead then stay besides him forever.
The way Gale was looking at me felt like he already knows what am thinking, he lifted his hand to my face once again. His finger pressed on my lips lightly and feathery, if it was the old days I guess I would be shivering from this touch.
But in this world most things are different, his eyes captured mine and I couldn't bare to look away.
"When you got pregnant I was so happy, it felt like everything was falling in place Mel. " he sighed softly while lowering his gaze to the floor " but when I was talking to the doctor, he told me that they had found certain elements in your blood then he asked if you had any history with Cancer."
"What ?" I said immediately, my eyes on Gale who was sitting in front of me. I frowned, I always wondered how my cancer deteriorated so fast yet it had been in my body even before I knew it and what caught most of my attention was the fact that Gale knew and never warned me.

I felt so numb unable to figure out what exactly I should be feeling so I just kept silent.
" But I didn't know much so I didn't answer then he told me that chances of having the baby were less if you really have cancer " Gale stopped for a minute then smiled sadly before looking away from me " But you see Mel, you're the first and last girl that I loved in that life. You meant the world to me and I was also willing to do anything so you can stay with me even if it meant to force you to abort the baby "
In all this I was silent just watching him and his actions, the love we shared was never equal but I know one thing for sure Gale loved me way too much than I did. He was willing to sacrifice even his life for me and he did that day, this simple sacrifice of me letting go of life to be with him was the least I can do for our love.
So imagine how I felt when he told me that I can't belong to this world but it's where he is and I want to stay with him.

"I was afraid of losing you but what I didn't know was you be the one to lose me and then you would try to die just to be with me " Gale added, this time round he didn't avoid my eyes anymore so he leaned forward and placed a light kiss on my forehead.
Then stood up which caused me to be alert and I also stood up immediately.
"You have loved me Amelia, far more than I expected and I can now let go so should you. We will meet again soon Mel if only you still will be loving by then " when he said that I wanted to retort immediately but he didn't give me a chance as his body started to drift away from me slowly.
"now it's time for you to go back Mel, take care of my mom for me that's all I ask " even though his voice was close and I heard all those words I didn't want to let him go yet.
Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried to go after him "No... Gale don't go " I said softly as my voice shook with so many emotions.
But with every step I took the distance between us differed in miles and my heart shook with fear, anxiety swirled through my veins and I tried get closer to his shadow that was starting to disappear but the darkness stopped me and I lost the sense of direction.
"No No No " I couldn't myself from crying, all that I had done to have Gale by side again was in vain and at the end we couldn't be together.
I felt a strong wave of anger, the urge to scream or destroy something was too much. I felt like nothing meant sense right now, I tugged at my hair in anger.
" 1 2 3 " I had a loud voice come through and I halted all my actions with a frown, it felt like it came from a far but so close. In the next second I frowned when I started to feel different.
My body was starting to become invisible slowly by slowly, no I couldn't go back yet. I felt like a wave of electricity rush through my veins towards my heart making it stop for minute before it thudded again.
My eyes bulged and my hands started shaking, I can feel all that my body is going through so that means that my time here is over. Am alive?
I chuckled numbly, not knowing if I should be so happy over this or sad because things didn't go the way I had wanted them to and that's what I wanted to.
Slowly my body became more and more invisible and all I can do was watch as everything happened until the fog vanished from my sight and I was being dragged to a light, blinded by its sharpness my eyes fell close.
I can't tell what happened next but what I remember the most was when my eyes flattered open I noticed some one face as they leaned over my face.
It was for a second before she moved away, I felt a warm cloth wiping my left arms.
" When the doctor said you're dead I thought it all ended that minute but then you came back, I wonder what you were doing in those eight minutes when you had died " A soft voice loomed over me as I looked around the familiar room that I had spent weeks in before while waiting for my death and which won't be happening any time soon from now.
I turned my head to the person who was still speaking to me but nothing clicked in my mind except the fact that I was dead for eight minutes, if am to calculate correctly the time I spent speaking to Gale was exactly with seven to eight minutes.
" Maggie " I called out softly, my voice hoarse and my throat was hurting so badly. The old lady froze for minute, her head turned to my face and the cloth she was using to wipe my body awhile ago slipped out of her hands to the floor.
Tears welled up in Maggie's eyes  as she looked at me, her whole body was shaking so much that it scared me.
"Hey stop scaring me " I added and tried to sit up but I felt like all the bones in my had been broken, I beat on my bottom lip so hard and colour drained from my face.
This seemed to pull her out of her thoughts and she immediately rushed to me " hey you shouldn't be try to get up "
Maggie's hands pinned on my shoulders and pushed me back down on the bed, though she tried to act strong the glass tears could been in her eyes. I smiled at her and sge frowned back.
I can't deny the fact I missed Maggie and her strictness.
" Don't even smile at me, do your best to get better so that I give you an earful " she added and I nodded obediently. At least she was okay so there was no need for my worry.
My whole body hurt so much like I had walked a thousand miles and my eye lids were heavy but I didn't want to sleep yet. After spending seven weeks alone and then trying to survive through that darkness all alone made me realise that indeed I missed those few that were like a family like me.
But it also didn't stop the fact that. I was depressed but I was starting to believe what Gale said about Charts cause after all that I had tried so I can die how can I be so awake in the hospital once again.
Maybe it's time to try and get to terms with everything that had happened between me and Gale and how things ended between us. But how will I be to cope with it, where am I start from when everything around me reminds me of him.
Where am I starting from right now to make my life better, how will I be able to gather the fallen pieces of my life when he is my life.
After everything why did it all end like this Gale, what exactly are you planning for me God.
Should I be happy that the days on my chart haven't ended yet because am really surprised that things are going this way.
"I will go call the doctor " Maggie said cutting through my thoughts and I turned to look at her, I could feel that she has been looking at me for a while but I didn't notice.
She looked at me one more time and then turned around walking away, I felt the urge to say something to her but didn't get a chance as the door closed behind her.
I heard sniffles from the other side and lowered my eyes not knowing how to react to her tears. It was clearly visible that her tears were because of me, I had never thought that I hurt her so much.
To Maggie I was a daughter the only family that she has after her husband's death, she never had children so when we got closer I filled up that hole in her heart.
I guess I did hurt the people around me and maybe I should use this second chance given to me to make everything right.
"I miss you Gale " I whispered softly doing my best to forget all that happened but where am I to start from right now, maybe I should focus on fixing all the relationships around me first.
Am back at the beginning once again, new life here I am. Starting over may not be that bad after all but moving on will be the hardest job for me but since am here then I should take it step by step.